Saturday, May 20, 2006

Rulers, Rhymes, and Reasons. . . Yesterday, the Mystics waived Aiysha Smith in order to make space on the roster for Latvian native Zane Teilane, who had been waived by the Detroit Shock. And what a lot of space it is . . . at least vertically! By the ruler, Zane stands 79 inches. That's 6 foot 7 for those who are measurement impaired.

We've been told that Zane's first and last names rhyme. But as for how to pronounce them. . . hmmm, therein lies the rub. Admittedly, the BasketCases are linguistically challenged, so we've been busy doing research, including from our sources in Latvia. (For those who still think Wales is in England, Latvia is not a town in upstate New York, it's in Eastern Europe.) The best we can tell is that it's pronounced Zonnie (rhymes with Connie) Tah-Lonnie, or it's Zon-(rhymes with Conn)-New Tah-Lan-New, or just possibly Zooney (rhymes with looney) Tay-lonnie. The one thing we're pretty certain of is that it's not Zane (rhymes with sane, which the BasketCases definitely are not) Tah-lane. The BasketCases will continue their investigation into the mystery of the pronunciation. Watch this space for further developments.

Obviously, the reason that the Mystics have signed Zane is to go "Big." Zane is a Center out of Western Illinois, where she was a Mid-Continent Conference (considered a mid-major) two-time Player of the Year and Defensive Player of the Year. She's a young player, obviously with good size, but in need of development. The BasketCases welcome her to the Mystics, where Assistant Coach Tree Rollins, who measures 86 inches, will take her under his formidable wing and work to turn her into a genuine W-quality center. The BasketCases are heartened by the words of one message board poster who wrote: "Zane is the biggest thing to leave Latvia since the Russian Army."


At 7:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

No WNBA game on Channel 7 yesterday! What a bummer. The game was replaced by some third rate mob movie.

Today's Washington Post's wrapup of yesterday's three games is not much better. The column was shorter, and further back in the section, than an article on google maps for running.

At 8:49 AM, Blogger BasketCases said...

We couldn't agree more; we were writing our blog (above) just as you were commenting. Call Channel 7! Thanks for your comment.

At 6:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


zah' nee
tu lah' nee

At 6:55 AM, Blogger BasketCases said...

Thank you!


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